Starting Line

It's partially because I need to write all of this down, it's partially because I want others to understand, but mostly it's because I need to feel like I might be able to help someone else. I've read a few blogs from women who are dealing with endometriosis and other chronic illnesses and found myself nearly in tears at just the thought that I am not alone. I know it's cliche, but the loneliness, the alienation, it's almost the worst part.

I hope that someone reads this blog and has some ideas as to what to ask they're doctor next time they visit. Or maybe someone will read who has symptoms like mine but has never found a diagnosis. Possibly someone will read and find comfort knowing they can get through it, too. Maybe I will find a friend, and maybe I will find some answers. In any case, it couldn't hurt. So here I write.

I was 19 when I finally started asking questions about my pain. At nineteen I finally described the horrible periods, the massive bleeding, the awful pain, the unending nausea that had been going on every month since I was 14 years old. Mainly it was all started at 18 by a ruptured ovarian cyst that happened at a swim meet my freshman year in college. I was travelling with my team, we had just finished a meet in SoCal and headed to a team dinner from one of our sponsors. I noticed sharp pain that radiated down through my pelvis, horrible pressure, and stabbing pains throughout my abdomen. I had to rush to the bathroom to seek solace to cry, to figure out what was wrong with me. I was embarrassed. When a teammate found me on the floor of the bathroom, they carried me out and took me to the UCLA hospital. I waited in pain for 6 hours. They did emergency pelvic exams, CT scans, ultrasounds, nearly took my appendix out. Finally they found free floating fluid in my abdomen. Luckily, my mother was at the swim meet and could rush to the ER to find me. She explained her past, and a temporary diagnosis was found. My mother had an 11cm ovarian cyst rupture about twenty years earlier. The surgery they did after it ruptured diagnosed stage 4 endometriosis. The genetic ties for this disease are strong and once the GYN heard that, she was set on my diagnosis of a ruptured ovarian cyst. No laparoscopy to get an initial answer, but of course nothing definitive could be determined without one. So shortly after, at 19, I was prescribed continuous birth control to give my reproductive system a rest. I thought I was finally saved. I was young, and naive.